Hole and Corner

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Chapter 2 - "The Hit"

Voting ended 4/3/2009

Chapter 2 - "The Hit"

Mike reveals his secret, and Ben gets thrown into a bigger mess than he ever could have expected.

Credits

  • Ben - Shane
  • Mike - Joey
  • Tom - Joe
  • Boom #1 - Casandra
  • Boom #2 - Joey
  • Writers - Joey/Joe/Jake/Shane/Casandra/Valerie

Scoring

Weighted Community Vote Weighted Judges' Vote Total Score
17.4%
+
50.0%
=
67.4%

Judges' Votes

The acting wasn't the best, but the camerawork, editing, writing and production were all years beyond the other entries. Really nice job guys.


I think this entry carries the story the best, I only wish the writing was a little better/creative. For example, Ben doesn't hesitate for a second to help his roommate break into his work. I think there could have been a whole dramatic entry inbetween the first one and where this one ends.

Overall pretty decent acting, editing, whatnot. But this is about as expected and straightforward as you can get from the plot.

Good luck, TheCrew!


I watched every video twice before voting and yours stood out to me for a few reasons. 1. While watching your video submission I was on the edge of my seat. I felt an anxiety that should be felt when watching a suspense film. Fantastic job on picking music! 2. Out of all the submissions, yours left the story the most open ended so that the next filmmakers could have the freedom to come up with an equally creative idea. --This is very important. The fact that you did this tells me you understand the competition. --Again, great job. 3. Who edited this? You should give credit to your editor! I like how you seem to have an understanding of when to keep certain frames longer than others in order to create a specific vibe for your film. 4. Who did the DP work? You framed your shots nicely. Noticed the panning action. Great job! It wasn't overindulgent, and gave the viewers a reason to keep watching and wanting more from this story.


Nice job guys. The editing was very lean and efficient. Camera angle, music and shot selection were creative and executed with precision and made this submission stand out above the other entries. Energy of the piece drives the story from one shot to the next. Audio levels were a little low for dialogue. Acting is a little weak but accomplishes the necessary. I'm sure acting will improve. Plot was my least favorite element but still made sense and carried the story from the original Rootclip and makes a nice path for the story to continue on. I was interested from beginning to end! Keep up the good work and can't wait to see your next piece!


Great pacing... the story got straight to the point and did so with fast transitions. Nice camera work, too! Nicely framed shots, especially on the OTS's... also liked the mimicked dolly shot to introduce Tom into the episode. It was the perfect shot to bring him into the story and helped build suspense. I'm guessing you're using a 35mm adapter... looks nice. Good progression of the story, a bit predictable, but well executed. I would have quickly re-shot the shot of Ben and Mike walking through the parking lot. Seems Shane was busy worrying about camera-placement and snuck a couple of quick looks right at camera. Anyway, you guys are the winners in my eyes. Great stuff!



Comments

3/30/2009 at 11:22 a.m. by JGutta

hell yah son...im mike!...our video came out mad good

3/30/2009 at 12:12 p.m. by FungusRidden

Smells like JakusB. Hardcore. ;)

Superb entry with a really nice ending to work off of for next chapter; I think this entry would result in a strong path for the continuation of the story. The shots look good, the acting is pretty strong, the choice of music was effective. The only major point left to keep working at is the audio, but odds are that without investing in better mics (or making location sacrifices), it could be hard to squeeze more quality out there.

Hats off, this entry is expert and solid. Best of luck. :>

3/30/2009 at 1 p.m. by echoes

Very well put together in my opinion. Nice fluidity and use of angles.....not to mention that seeing spanky get shot up is funny as hell.

Gingy- PM class XP

3/30/2009 at 1:01 p.m. by MelMorphine

I thought it was well put together. The shot angels were really good. The story followed and was interesting. The end was great with that "Hey roomie" Great job guys. Good luck!

3/30/2009 at 1:12 p.m. by catz18

Really good i like it. mostly the different camera shots. good luck!!!!!!

3/30/2009 at 1:12 p.m. by Bullrockata

This was really great guys the best of luck 2 you guys pce

pm

3/30/2009 at 2:39 p.m. by charliechaplin

Voted for this one... reluctantly.

I don't want to see this site fail. But I hate to see the mobster angle worked into every story. But this is by far better than the rest.

3/30/2009 at 3:43 p.m. by FungusRidden

I sympathize, Chaplin. The Big Boss story is getting tired. Thankfully, this story is still young.

3/30/2009 at 3:55 p.m. by 8512S

???WHAT??? This doesn't even make sense! The camera work and editing were ok, but the plot? Hit men are supposed to do jobs for money. Why would he kill the roommate's boss? Come on... A little creativity PLEASE. Maybe if they spent a little time on a creative story instead of wasting time on editing. And with 10 seconds to spare? Could have done something with that time to come up with something better.

3/30/2009 at 6:26 p.m. by JakusB

@85125 Where's your submission? First of all, I don't see how it "doesn't make sense." He received the hit job (for money) from whoever the "sir" was on the phone in chapter 1. He said he could do the job, but said he was going to need more help (that is, getting inside). The "sir" must have asked if his roommate realized that he was about to kill his boss, and Mike replied "No way, he has no idea." Upon hearing that Ben was laid off, he saw the perfect opportunity to get into the building by roping Ben into it. There wasn't a lot of time "wasted on editing," it was fairly straight forward. I think this story actually uses quite a bit of creativity, as it is the only one to involve ALL of the characters introduced in the first story..

3/30/2009 at 8:55 p.m. by BlackHawk

Its good to see we have a new troll around, there hasn't been one for awhile. 8512S, I know your really proud of your friends video, but you don't need to attack the other competition. Its okay to say "Hey, both these videos are good, but here are some things you could work on..." rather than just accusing them of having no creativity or some other irrational comment that just makes you look immature and like a troll.

3/30/2009 at 9:04 p.m. by JGutta

8512S......pound salt;....when i c an entry from u then u can tlk smack

3/30/2009 at 9:07 p.m. by JGutta

but untill then dont tlk smack on my entry

3/30/2009 at 9:09 p.m. by kevin

I'm with BlackHawk

3/31/2009 at 12:19 a.m. by jdemeere

I like how you opened up with this video. The direction leads the audience to the subject which is the file of the hit. The tilt up from the folder to the actor right as he says his line is great. The over the shoulder shots are spot on. There is depth of field going and the cut away shots all work. The audio is not hard to hear which is my pet peeve and the cuts are at a good pace to keep you interested. The only thing that draws me out would be the story seems a little out of touch with the age group that is playing the parts. I know it is fun to do hit man type of stories but for the age group it seems a little too extreme. I know how that can be difficult considering the way the competition is structured so there isn't a whole lot we can do about that. The acting was great! Overall I think this is great and looking forward to seeing how this turns out. Good luck!

3/31/2009 at 6:08 a.m. by TheCrew

@jdemeere Doing this video was a class assignment for school. We HAD to shoot at our school, and we HAD to use our classmates as actors. Therefore, there isn't much we could do about the whole age thing. This applies to myself, Rockness_Monster, echoes, and catz18.

Another thing to keep in mind is that a rootclip short is not like most other shorts. You have to "give" a little for each rootclip, and understand that there are going to be differences. The characters and locations vary so much in height, appearance, AGE, etc. Those are things that can't be controlled. If this was a "normal" short, having 17-18 year old's acting adult parts wouldn't fly. But RootClip is different. We're forced to act those parts despite the jump in age. Rather than looking at the actor, try seeing the character.

3/31/2009 at 9:47 a.m. by jdemeere

@TheCrew ahhh I see. Well it is good either way. That is pretty cool. I wish I had assignments like that when I was in school. Good job and hope you got an A.

3/31/2009 at 9:50 a.m. by WAKEupJAKEup

Its good, a little hard for me to admit, but its a solid submission. the actors do a good job playing their roles, the editing is superb, and the audio is quite clear. Although the style of Jakus b's videos never really seems to change much, i have to give you guys props. Nice workkkkkk

3/31/2009 at 9:54 a.m. by BohemianFilmCommune

I'm diggin it, The extreme close ups of Ben are pretty extreme, but that's just nit picky bidness..I love the "Yello" from the co-worker!

8512S, c'mon dude.....really? You're gonna be that guy? It reflects poorly on your friend, if anything.

3/31/2009 at 11 a.m. by JGutta

hahah word thanks Jkillah

3/31/2009 at 12:18 p.m. by TheCrew

@BohemianFilmCommune I think your referring to the extreme close ups of mike? And that was done intentionally to create an "uncomfortable" feeling about him. And @jdemeere thanks, and same to you.

3/31/2009 at 4:30 p.m. by MIstermatrix24

Wow.. absolutely loved this submission. although it was kinda disappointing how it only took me 3 seconds to determine this was a JakusB submission lol. i definitely think i'm going to submit for chapter 3 if this one wins.

4/2/2009 at 11:30 p.m. by likwid

Cool vid man! Acting (and script) was solid and I liked both the angles and the music chosen. Added to the tension build up. The only thing that stood out as a negative to me was the glance to the camera that Ben gave while they were both walking towards the building. But a solid effort guys. By the way, what was the type of camera used? And was there a filter used too?

4/2/2009 at 11:51 p.m. by JakusB

Thanks likwid! That shot bothered me too, but I didn't notice the glance til post, so there wasn't much I could do about it.

The camera is a Canon GL2 with a Redrock M2 adapter attached. Creates some nice images, doesn't it?

4/3/2009 at 12:25 p.m. by jdemeere

Congrats. I can agree with this result.

4/3/2009 at 2:16 p.m. by fiercedeityys

Congrats on the unanimous win! :D

4/3/2009 at 11:18 p.m. by JakusB

Thanks everyone! I just realized I totally left myself out of the credits. I was the DP, editor, etc. @jdemeere, I hope we'll be seeing you again! We will, right?

4/4/2009 at 8:34 a.m. by jdemeere

Of course!