Chapter 3 - "Fight & Flight"
After deciding to defend the Alien, Lainey tries to hide him in an old barn, but Jim, in a rage after being hit on the head, follows them. And he’s not thinking happy thoughts.
Credits
- Perrmission for use - Mr.E
- Alien - Tony
- Lainey - Kara
- Jim - Richard
- Support team - Mrs. E and Nana
Scoring
Weighted Community Vote
Weighted Judges' Vote
Total Score
24.1%
+
10.0%
=
34.1%
Judges' Votes
Very cinematical. I definitely see improvement in you guys. Sure, maybe there were a few minor problems, but the plot was very good (I love the shot where the Alien is peeking out from behind the post). Looking forward to what happens next!
Comments
@muscleman- We done good on this one man! lol Here's to us, the contestants that have the most fun!
Nice job!! Your definitely stepping it up.
The editing in spots was really really shoddy... a lot of jump cuts and disorienting camera placement.
Much better. You certainly are trying to keep up the action and suspense.
@mmorri24- where was the "shoddy" spots? And the "jump cuts"? I'm not doubting your opinion I'm just trying to find out how to improve.
The first shot of the barn wasn't enough of an establishing shot to make it clear what was up there, which makes it confusing when the boyfriend is clearly in a barn before he heads down the stairs. The lighting when they were heading down the stairs was too dark. The first jump cut was right after the girlfriend's first line in the basement (she suddenly moves a few inches), the again after she says "Jim, stop". After he takes a swing at her you can clearly see the shadow of the alien's hat on the wall, which makes it hard to believe that he wouldn't have seen him. The next jump cut is after he hits the knife against the ceiling beam. That's it. You just need to work on seamless editing and better establishing shot/ breakdowns.
@mmorri24-Thanks, I appreciate it.
When Jim and Lainey are arguing and it cuts to the alien gripping the stick, I would have kept the fight going on in the background. They were having a pretty heated arguement, and for it to go suddenly quiet was a little awkward. I also agree with morri about the jump cuts. They are always a bad thing. But your definitely improving!
The next big thing to work on is your audio. If your not already, I HIGHLY suggest getting a shotgun microphone for your camera. Any microphone built into your camera is a piece of crap. Most shotgun mic's attach to the top of your camera. If you want to get really fancy, you can use a boom mic for even better clarity. But keep at it, you only get better!
Much better, guys! There were some really good points to this video, very cinematical. Sure there may be a few editing "flaws" here and there, but I think that's subjective and you are definitely improving.
Where'd you find that underground barn location? It was pretty cool.
Nice work! I also like the location, very "creepy".
Way to go muscleman! Good acting!
Good job; I would not want y'all coming down into my basement barn!! I'm so proud of all the time and effort you put into the show. Keep on keeping on! You've gotten helpful comments too.. thanks for that..
It's clear you guys put some energy behind this and got something back! The story feels a little like treading water, but you worked some menacing tension into the mix, particularly with the handheld as Jim stalks after Lainey (and slams that knife into a few beams as well!)
Overall, I think it exudes the emotion you wanted, and it's successful in being fairly methodical and clear to follow. A little more conceptually, and touching up some of the shots and editing points, will make you a definite favorite for future rounds, should you not win this chapter. Nice work and keep at it!
I think I'm gonna have to send my vote your way because of your improvement and the fact that I like your cliff hanger the most. Keep it up guys, great job!
@Fungus- Dude, I can't wait to film again so that can apply all this advice! This is great!
Great show!
Dude, you're a wicked pychopath. Nice job, muscleman and crew!
@ sewwhat-Ha-ha I'm a better actor than I thought i would be...
Good work and good critique so far. Keep in mind how much of the story the music is telling.
It's clear that you guys have a great time shooting these chapters. You choose some great locations and props. Be mindful of the placement of your characters so that you don't catch extraneous people or shadows on camera. I loved the music you chose for this round - it really plays with the action well.
i hope you guys win! 12 hours left (not like I've checked or anything!) lol
nice work bro :-) all those torturouse plays we did where good4something.lol
Hey guys, tough break with the judges and all. But I know you have enough promise and potential to sweep the next chapter clean. Get back out there with your camera -- I want to see your next scene! :>
@FungusRidden- Idk the other story's ending is a tough one... All my back yards are filled with snow! lol :D
Back to the t-shirts in the cold!
LOL! I'm gonna have to have my actors sign a release form: "the director/cameraman/writer is not responsible for any injury (including frost bite) that occurs during the shoot." :D